I went to the Austin Shakespeare Festival at Zilker Park yesterday. The free event was outdoors, so I had to bring a blanket to sit on to protect my bum from the bugs. After my pink Hello Kitty blankie was mocked, the Offskintastic was passed through the group. I had reason to fervently snag that bottle. If a mosquito is within a seven-mile radius, she will find me and attempt to feed. However, I declined. For what reason would I do such a thing? I have this theory that bug repellant is like human sauce to mosquitos. The times when I don’t wear bug spray, they suck my blood. The times when I spray it on, they suck my blood. Why bother spraying chemicals on my skin, long-term side effects on me unknown? Plus, it seems like after years of use, mosquitos would develop some sort of human smell sense. Is it that they smell sweat, or blood, or bug spray to determine where they will insert their proboscis? If they detect us by sweat scent, then spraying this stuff on my skin would do no good being that in Texas, standing outside for more than two minutes will make your sweat glands cry uncle. Then the spray runs… and ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ they find you, slurping your blood and probably drinking the spray like whipped cream on a coffee. mmmm. To spray or not to spray, that is the question.